Jay Beyer and I had a unique relationship. You see, we were "locker partners" all through high school. Every morning we would greet each other, "Goodmorning Miss Toscano, Good morning Mr. Beyer". This went on for three years. Sometimes he would help me open my locker, help me get my stuff in or out. It was just that way.
Jay to me was an unassuming guy--not involved in the popularity contests, not in the limelight--not (to put it bluntly) like me. For me he represented a safe haven away from all that. No pressure to be perfect, no pressure to show off--just me and Jay at the lockers saying good morning to each other.
On graduation day I was busy saying goodbye to people and them saying goodbye to me. I was well aware that I probably would not see many of these faces again, and I was sad and trying to hold it together. As the event came to a close and we all proceeded out of the gym I wandered down the hall on my own. I stumbled into Jay-- "Good morning Miss Toscano"--that was my breaking point, I totally lost it--I literally cried like a baby I was so bereft at the thought of not seeing Jay every morning again. We hugged the stuffings out of eachother.
I never did see him again, but I swear to you that in all of his unassuming, easygoing manner, he put a mark on me. I will always remember him in his senior hat, and marching in the school band playing the clarinet and wearing those God awful band uniforms with the pants too short--white socks sticking out.
I pray that he found happiness and completeness in his life and I send his family and friends my condolences. Thank you Jay, my locker buddy, for all the good mornings. Love, Kristina ("Miss Toscano")
Kristina - your testimonial to Jay was as moving as any human interest story I've ever read anywhere. Even though I started in elementary school with Jay - as you did - I really didn't know him, except to say hi. I'm sure I acknowledged him in the halls of PHS, just going by - "hey Jay" - that kind of thing. Wherever Jay is today, you made him happy.
It's taken some time to collect my thoughts and memories about Jay. That's because Jay was one of my closest and dearest friends. Jay's been described as unassuming. Yes he was....unassuming and unpretentious. But with a heart as big as all outdoors. Whether it was about running to the "Candy Store" to get yet another marker to finish that bed sheet banner for tomorrow's Met game (always paid for by him) or volunteering the back wall of his house (of course without consent) as the backstop/strike zone for our daily version of of "Home Run Derby" regardless of the implications on the parental ("I think we broke another tile") front. Jay's greatest joy was that of giving with no regard or concern for "return". He was simply happy to make others happy.
That bond between, Jay, Peter Piro and I continued through College and into our adult years. We were at his side for his marriage to his lovely bride Carol, for the addition of their son Harlan and for most all the Beyer parties. He was always a member of my extended family.
A few years ago, I had the pleasure of attending Jay's 50th Birthday party and decided to take him back to Shea one more time. And although he was already going through some physical issues, we both enjoyed the game and that evening with the same passion and unbridled (and sometimes sophomoric) zeal as we did some 36 years earlier. After all these years some might say, "some things never change". When it came to Jay...my response... "nor should they".
Jay helped me understand the true and limitless bond that comes with a friendship like ours. It can and will never be broken. I think about it and him often.
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